are you there God? it's me ... tracie

A friend {ever so wisely} recently reminded me that God wouldn't give me more than I can handle.  She also mentioned that she's pretty sure I'm close to my limit ... true dat!  :)

I hate that my spirit is sagging.

I hate that I can't seem to lift above it.

I hate that I'm feeling this way and complaining when I should be gearing up to celebrate our Savior's birth {and some presents too!}.

I hate that the kids are off of school now, and I'm having to go into work.  I said my "good-bye's and Merry Christmases" on Thursday, with every intention of fully immersing myself into my kids lives {while finishing up with wrapping, etc. when I could}.

I hate that I still have myself and 3 kids to pack {but thankful I'm blessed to be going on vacation and thank God Taylor packs herself!}.

I hate that I have a zillion web orders coming into the store {how sad is that?} because I don't want to have to go into the store right now.

I hate that I have to ask my mom to come over and watch the girls and that I can't be with them myself.

I hate that I'll most likely be working Christmas Eve too.

I hate that I had to go back to work tonight and just got home.

I hate that things are in such disarray at work.

I hate that I'm hating so many things.

I want a joyful spirit.  I want a holiday spirit.  I want a restful spirit.

I hate that I'm saying "I want."

Okay, so back to apparently how much the Lord thinks I can handle.  So the store had a mention in Real Simple magazine ... awesome right?  It should be ... totally.  Except that, we weren't prepared for the outpouring of love the product would receive.  And that the store's product manager is gearing up for vacation.  And I was planning on being home with the kids.

When I saw the web orders flying in last weekend {71 orders!  a normal busy weekend is around 30ish}, I quickly sent a note to LobotoME to see if she could ship things out right away on Monday.  Sure, no problem ... except she wasn't planning on a snowstorm in Denver.  And I wasn't planning on a snowstorm here.

So here's the stress overload today:

1. I had to go to work.

2. Things pretty unorganized, but I can't stay to help because we have a program at Curt's work to be at.

3. After being home a short time {after the program}, I realize chaos is the state of bwp and I'll need to go back into work that evening.

4. I desperately want to go to dinner and a movie with Curt and the girls ... so I know it's going to be way late before I can get to the store.

5. I order chicken fajitas at dinner, and receive chicken quesadillas.

6. Get a call as the movie starts that the LobotoME order is lost.  UPS is really surprised, as the woman has never heard of this happening before.  But there I am with unfulfilled web orders up the wazoo and a lost shipment.

7. This is really awesome ... are you ready?  I dropped my iphone in the itoilet and now it's inop!

8. Lastly ... the car's out of gas.

I'm in the car {clocked over 2 hours of driving today} and trying to get into a worshipful, praiseful spirit.  Let it all go ... let the Lord take care of it.  And the midst of the crease in my brow getting so deep it hurts ... the Lord gave me peace.  He promised he will take care of it.

Over and over ... I'd start thinking about this and that, and he would say, "I'll take care of you."

What an awesome God.  I thank you Lord for reminding me that you're there.  You haven't forgotten me.  You will take care of me and you'll never give me more than I can handle.  One question though ... will my tank be full tomorrow morning?  :)

Heather, I love you more than words ... thank you for also 'saving' me tonight.  You are a blessing my friend.